I got back to ATL late last night and brought a splitting headache w/me. So splitting, it was still w/me when I woke up this AM and took 2 doses of Tylenol to fade away by late afternoon.
Other than being a bit tired, I’m fine. I managed to get in 2 workouts whilst I was gone a BIG deal for me. And also ate clean every day from Tues to Frid. Saturday we both ate out.
I had a few light bulb moments during my time away and will get my thoughts sorted on what I’m feeling and what direction I’m going in, both personally and publiclly as it concerns my blog. Were I to be 100% honest, I emotionally checked out of blogging here a very long time ago and have just been going thru the motions.
Part of the problem was my need to keep things the same, despite feeling otherwise. Which caused me to start shutting down to the point where I find myself forcing myself to post, moreso than doing it out of any true desire.
There’s many reasons for it. A general malaise about my life and what I’m not doing and should be doing vs. what I want to do vs. feeling stuck. As well as the big ole elephant in the room, I’ve had a weight loss blog for 2 years and have managed to gain 20lbs.
While where I live serves many purposes, I am NOT happy w/the situation and it takes all of my emotional energy to have a stiff upper lip, that when the time comes for me to do what I’ve always done online, I don’t have the ooomph anymore.
And on and on and on.
However, I dunno, I’m scrappy I guess. I may sulk and pout for a bit. I may even let myself get defeated, but deep down, I always plan for a way out of whatever I’m feeling.
So, later this week, I have a book review for tomorrow, I’ll put words to what I’m thinking and feelind and where I’m changing the site a bit. A few may have noticed certain things have “vanished” or changed…I put other features on hiatus…hopefully the system I’m thinking about will not only work better for those who are interested in what I have to say, it’ll re-engage my passion for blogging.
So thanks for still checking in and being patient…